So, I find this little dog and my whole life gets flipped for a loop--Zephyr's too, poor guy--but that's how life works. It's okay--or, it will be okay, or it is depending on how I look at it--the glass is half empty or half full. And people have been SO GENEROUS. I'm floored by it all, but not used to the flurry, commotion, attention, distraction, the whole EVENT of it all, I just haven't caught my breath yet.
Last night, at 3am, Zephyr and I were startled awake by little guy yowling from his box. I ran downstairs to find him all agitated. I took him outside, not much help. He was all in a dither, scratching his ears and wobbling.
I took him back to the vet today, way out in the burbs--the vet I was going to specifically for a dental overhaul CONSULTATION. Alas, 30 minutes later we had a mass ear infection diagnosis plus an extensive dental layout. We walked out with a boat load of meds: TrizUltra + Keto: ear cleaning fluid, Mometamax: a steroid, I think, Biomax: an antibiotic and Tramadol for pain. Ka-ching: $140. There goes Christmas.
Plus, the dental estimate which ranges from an absolutely easy-peasy surgery at $195 to the most extensive teeth extractions, neuter and prolonged anesthesia at a conservative $473. Please lord, pass the wine...
As the honeymoon of finding little guy wears down and the cost goes up, I am settling into my former panic--bills, bills, bills, rent, and, oh, Christmas. My niece is the only one receiving this year and I feel shitty about that. I'm having a bad-grown up moment. Then I think of my niece and how she'd give up a present for little guy because she adores him, even though she's only met him once so far.
I have to remember--over, over and over--that the universe has been incredibly generous. Strangers have donated money, kind wishes, encouragement, direction, dog treats and good comfort. I look in the mirror, again and again, repeat with shaky will: I AM BLESSED.
d, xo
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